Bird nesting describes a co-parenting arrangement where the children remain in the family home and parents rotate in and out according to a set schedule.
In some cases, the parents also maintain a separate shared residence for each to stay at when not on parenting duty.
Nesting is a great way to ease the transition to post-divorce family life, especially for little ones. Some of the benefits include:
- Stability and normalcy for the children who stay in their home and community
- Minimal expense for housing needs during the divorce
- Extra time for parties to negotiate property division and living arrangements post-divorce
Most families who function well under one roof are not looking to split up. The benefits of nesting may be worthwhile for a short while, but many divorcing couples are ready to move on as soon as possible. Some of the drawbacks of sharing a space with an ex include:
- Negative energy in the space
- Housekeeping disagreements
- Not having access to belongings during non-parenting times
Additionally, former spouses who share a home and a separate apartment may find it hard to explore new relationships while shuffling back and forth between dwellings.
When to end your nesting arrangement
Sharing a home can work well during divorce proceedings, but eventually, the parties will be ready to move on and establish a co-parenting relationship with healthy boundaries. Generally, once the parents begin living separate lives, the children will adjust to the reality of having two households.
If you worry about the negative impact of divorce on your children, it is important to consider your co-parenting options and make the best decisions for your family.